Do you enjoy smoking seven gram rocks? Does assisting a bevy of goddesses appeal to you? Do you have tigerblood running through your striped veins? Are you unemployed and measure 38-24-36? Do you wait, as oppose to sleep? Are you winning? If you answered yes to any of the above questions then you may be exactly who Charlie Sheen is looking for as his new intern.
Intern for what?, you may be asking. It seems that now that the Vatican assassin warlock is officially unemployed he needs some help in his social networking duties… this is the description for the job (seriously):
Description:Do you have #TigerBlood? Are you all about #Winning? Can you #PlanBetter than anyone else? If so, we want you on #TeamSheen as our social media #TigerBloodIntern!
This unique internship opportunity will allow a hard-working, self-motivated, creative, resourceful and social media savvy individual to work closely with Charlie Sheen in leveraging his social network. The internship will focus on executing a social media strategy that will build on the success Charlie Sheen has attained in setting the Guinness World Record for the fastest time to reach one million followers on Twitter. The #TigerBloodIntern is expected to be proactive, monitor the day-to-day activities on the major social media platforms, prepare for exciting online projects and increase Charlies base of followers.
You will learn how to promote and develop the social media network of Hollywoods most trending celebrity.
If that sounds like something you may be interested in… follow this link to fill out the application. If you’ve ever had dreams of aspiring to be the next Kato Kailin, then this may be your greatest opportunity ever! Be there when the Sheen-Titanic hits the cocaine-iceberg!!
Hurry though… this offer expires Friday, March 11th.
Suddenly feeling dirty and craving a shower,
Cornelius J. Blahg